Flow
Flow
TriniTuner.com  |  Latest Event:  

Forums

3 Rapture fails- Harold Camping apologizes, resigns

this is how we do it.......

Moderator: 3ne2nr Mods

User avatar
Dizzy28
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 18919
Joined: February 8th, 2010, 8:54 am
Location: People's Republic of Bananas

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby Dizzy28 » May 18th, 2011, 9:17 am

rossi wrote:There will be an ALL event on the 21st.

ALL, Alien Landing Lime, will commence from 2PM until our visitors arrive.
There will be van loads of rum and beers, busloads of women and cutters.


That will attract the Raj demographic in large numbers.

rossi
punchin NOS
Posts: 2954
Joined: May 31st, 2004, 11:52 pm

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby rossi » May 18th, 2011, 9:47 am

Dizzy28 wrote:
rossi wrote:There will be an ALL event on the 21st.

ALL, Alien Landing Lime, will commence from 2PM until our visitors arrive.
There will be van loads of rum and beers, busloads of women and cutters.


That will attract the Raj demographic in large numbers.


soo....ah shoulda put busloads of men then? for the classy ppl????

User avatar
Dizzy28
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 18919
Joined: February 8th, 2010, 8:54 am
Location: People's Republic of Bananas

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby Dizzy28 » May 18th, 2011, 10:12 am

rossi wrote:
Dizzy28 wrote:
rossi wrote:There will be an ALL event on the 21st.

ALL, Alien Landing Lime, will commence from 2PM until our visitors arrive.
There will be van loads of rum and beers, busloads of women and cutters.


That will attract the Raj demographic in large numbers.


soo....ah shoulda put busloads of men then? for the classy ppl????


Nah Dan. The time for the busloads ah men was the LGBT march yesterday.
We go stick with the busloads ah women and take a skant to the Supercat from the mandatory speakerboxes that go appear on top ah cars.

bluefete
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 14664
Joined: November 12th, 2008, 10:56 pm
Location: POS

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby bluefete » May 18th, 2011, 10:37 am

rossi wrote:
mitsuboi wrote:.

6. God won't ask in what neighborhood you lived, He'll ask how
you treated your neighbors.
naybors????

Actually, this is quite serious. A guy who lived, alone, a few streets away from me was discovered dead in his bed. Turns out he had been dead for 5 days before the neighbours smelt him.

Sad thing is no one on that street including his neighbours on either side bothered to check on him. He mainly kept to himself but was not unfriendly. This is right here in T&T.





Now with respect to this Rapture happening on May 21, 2011. It is people like Camping who give God a bad name. They even had a full page ad in our Sunday Express just gone. Given the huge listenership of Family Radio globally, I am surprised that they are confirming this as a given event. I wonder whether people like John Hagee and all the other multi-millionaire pastors who preach the false doctrine of the Rapture are in agreement with this.

I bet you NONE of them have sold their palatial homes or cars or given away all their money. Oh No. They are not that dotish. This is for their followers to do. Not them. After all, there is the possibility that May 22 will come around. And if they were to give away all their possessions, what will they do on the 22nd? Go take it back?


http://www.familyradio.com/index2.html

lostallos101
Riding on 18's
Posts: 1606
Joined: October 16th, 2010, 8:28 pm
Location: inna de car back..........

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby lostallos101 » May 18th, 2011, 4:05 pm

WASHINGTON (AFP) – When judgment day comes -- which some US Christian fundamentalists insist will happen on Saturday -- have you thought about what you're going to do with the family dog and cat?

In 26 US states, you could have them rescued and adopted by enterprising atheists who have set up a business to care for the animal companions of any Christians who are selected to go to heaven when Jesus Christ comes back.

"You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved. But when the Rapture comes, what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind?" Eternal Earth-Bound Pets says on its website, offering to "take that burden off your mind."

The post-doomsday pet rescue service already has 259 clients, who have paid $135 for the first pet and $20 for each additional pet at the same address, to ensure the faithful animal companions are looked after and loved even when their Christian owners have gone to the other side.

All the rescuers are sworn atheists, which means they will definitely be left behind on Earth, ready to rescue pets after the Rapture, which one US Christian fundamentalist group has penciled for Saturday.

When judgment day happens, Eternal Earth-Bound Pets co-founder Bart Centre "will notify all of our rescuers to go into action and they will drive to the homes of anyone who's signed a contract with us, pick up their pets and take them home and adopt them as their own, keeping them happy and healthy for the rest of their lives.

"This will happen only if and when the Rapture happens. So we do not expect to have to do anything on Saturday," Centre told AFP.

Contracts are good for 10 years, just in case the Mayan calendar prophesy, which predicts the world will end in December next year, comes true


hahahahahahaha

rossi
punchin NOS
Posts: 2954
Joined: May 31st, 2004, 11:52 pm

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby rossi » May 18th, 2011, 10:17 pm

Only TWO days to go! Allyuh bamsee cuttin nail as yet!?!?!?!

User avatar
megadoc1
punchin NOS
Posts: 3261
Joined: January 9th, 2006, 7:33 pm
Location: advancing the kingdom of heaven

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby megadoc1 » May 18th, 2011, 10:33 pm


lostallos101
Riding on 18's
Posts: 1606
Joined: October 16th, 2010, 8:28 pm
Location: inna de car back..........

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby lostallos101 » May 18th, 2011, 10:44 pm

As you may have learned from one of the 2,000 billboards worldwide, May 21, 2011, is Judgment Day, upon which the righteous – which totals 3 percent of humanity – will be whisked away to the sweet hereafter, leaving the rest of us to weather five months of extreme natural disasters until Oct. 21, whereupon God destroys the entire universe and everyone left in it.At least that's what Harold Camping says. The head of Family Radio broadcasting network, which boasts 150 outlets in the United States, has what his website calls "infallible, absolute proof" that there's no point in making plans for Memorial Day weekend. It goes like this:Camping says that because Jesus was crucified on Friday, April 1, 33 AD, and that it takes exactly 365.2422 days for the earth to complete one orbit of the sun, we can conclude that, on April 1, 2011, Jesus was crucified exactly 722,449.07 days ago. Add 51 days to this to get to May 1, and you get a figure of 722,500.07.Round that down to the nearest integer, and you get 722,500, which is an important number because it is the square of 5 x 17 x 10 . The number five, says Camping, represents atonement. Ten represents completeness, and 17 represents heaven. Multiply all these together – twice – and you get 722,500. Therefore the apocalypse kicks off on Saturday, May 21.Skeptics of Camping's method might ask why the date of the end of the world is linked to that of Jesus' crucifixion, why the numbers five, 10, and 17 represent what Camping claims they represent, why they should be multiplied together, why they should then be squared, and, for that matter, why the Bible would contain esoteric numerological references predicting the end of the world in the first place. They could also point out that April 1, 33 AD was actually a Wednesday, and that, under Camping's method, April 1, 2011 gets counted twice.Others use different methods to calculate the last day. For example, Dec. 21, 2012 marks the end of the 5,125-year-long cycle in the Mesoamerican Long Count calendar, leading some people – particularly those who believe that the dating systems of pre-Columbian Americans can predict events hundreds of years in the future – to believe that the world will end on that date

redmanjp
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 17670
Joined: September 22nd, 2009, 11:01 pm
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby redmanjp » May 19th, 2011, 1:35 am

so this man real play up with numbers yes

http://www.familyradio.com/graphical/literature/tracts/frames/index.html

God in His great mercy has given a marvelous proof that the year 2011 is the year of Judgment Day and the end of the world. Remember in 2 Peter 3:8, in the context of pointing us to the flood of Noah’s day as well as to the destruction of the world at the end of time, He declared: “one day with the Lord as a thousand years and a thousand years as one day.”

Years ago we learned from the Bible that the flood occurred in the year 4990 B.C. More recently we learned that Judgment Day is to occur in the year 2011 A.D. 2011 A.D. is exactly 7,000 years after 4990 B.C.

Just before the flood Noah was instructed by God that in seven days the flood would begin (Genesis 7:10-16). Using the language of 2 Peter 3:8 that “a day is as a thousand years,” it is like saying through Noah, who was a preacher (2 Peter 2:5): “mankind has seven days or 7,000 years to escape destruction.” Since 2011 A.D. is precisely 7,000 years after Noah preached, God has given mankind a wonderful proof that Judgment Day will occur in the year 2011.

God doubled the statement “a day is as a thousand years” to greatly increase our assurance that this is established by God and will shortly come to pass (Genesis 4l:32).

ANOTHER PROOF

God in His mercy has given another tremendous proof. It is as follows:

We have learned that the precise date of the cross was April 1, 33 A.D. when coordinated with our present modern calendar. April 1, 33 A.D. is the only date that meets all the requirements of the Bible, such as being a Friday that falls on the correct date for the Passover, which was the date Christ was to be crucified.

We also have known for some time that the date of the first day of the Day of Judgment coincides with the day when the Rapture will take place, on May 21, 2011. But then it was discovered that there are exactly 722,500 days from April 1, 33 A.D. until May 21, 2011. This fact gives us another infallible, absolute proof that May 21, 2011 is the date of the Rapture.

Because of the importance and wonder of this proof we will take time to develop it. First we must learn that we can develop with perfect precision the number of days from one date to another. To obtain the precise number of days from a moment in one year to the same moment in any other year we must realize that astronomers have long ago discovered that there are 365.2422 days in a complete year. That is why in our modern calendar there are 365 days in each of three consecutive years. However, every fourth year has 366 days. This is done by adding an extra day in February of that year. Thus the average year for the four years becomes 365.25 days. But .25 is greater than .2422, so every 128 years a day is dropped from the calendar to maintain accuracy.

Thus all we have to do is multiply the number of years separating two events by the number 365.2422 to know the exact number of days between them. So from April 1, 33 A.D. to April 1, 2011 there are exactly 2011 – 33 = 1,978 years, each having 365.2422 days. This equals 722,449.07 days. From April 1, 2011 to May 21, 2011 inclusively (including the first day and the last day) are 51 days. Adding these 51 days to the number 722,449.07 gives us exactly 722,500.07 days, from April 1, 33 A.D. to May 21, 2011 inclusively. This number is enormously significant. Presently we will see why this is so.

Some Numbers in the Bible Can Convey Spiritual Truth

God sometimes uses words in such a way that truth is conveyed that is not all apparent in the word itself. For example, the word “lamb” frequently points to Christ as the Lamb. The word “mountain” often signifies “kingdom,” “field” signifies “world,” “blood” signifies Christ giving His life, and “Jerusalem” often signifies the Kingdom of God. Likewise some numbers in the Bible also frequently point to spiritual truth. We will look at five numbers that are examples of this, as they focus on significant spiritual truth. These numbers are 3, 5, 10, 17, and 23.

The number 3 signifies God’s purpose. When the Bible writes about Christ being crucified, the number 3 is featured about 15 times: 3 crosses, 3 apostles, 3 denials by Peter, etc. All of these 3’s are emphasizing it was absolutely God’s purpose that Christ be crucified.

The number 5 signifies the atonement or redemption (that is, Christ died to pay for the sins of those who become saved). This is seen, for example, by the ½ (.5) shekel atonement money which pointed to the atonement. Exodus 30:15 declares:


The rich shall not give more, and the poor shall not give less than half a shekel, when they give an offering unto the LORD, to make an atonement for your souls.


It is seen by the 5 shekels being a picture of redemption, as demonstrated in Numbers 3:47-48:


Thou shalt even take five shekels apiece by the poll, after the shekel of the sanctuary shalt thou take them: (the shekel is twenty gerahs:) And thou shalt give the money, wherewith the odd number of them is to be redeemed, unto Aaron and to his sons.


The number 10 or 100 or 1,000 signifies completeness. For example, the Bible speaks of 10 coins or 100 sheep or 1,000 years. God speaks of Satan being bound 1,000 years in Revelation 20:2-3. However, from much additional Biblical information we know he was bound between the years 33 A.D. and 1988 A.D. These 1,955 actual years are symbolized by 1,000 years. The Bible speaks of Him being bound 1,000 years to signify that He was bound for the completeness of God’s plan, which actually was 1,955 years.

The number 17 frequently signifies “Heaven.” For example, in Jeremiah God describes the destruction of Judah and Jerusalem by the king of Babylon. This was typifying the end of the church age, at which time Satan, typified by the king of Babylon destroying Jerusalem and Judah, would rule in the churches. In that seemingly hopeless context Jeremiah was instructed to buy a field for the purchase price of 17 shekels of silver. God instructed Jeremiah that this purchase of land for 17 shekels was done as a guarantee or demonstration that the time would come that Israel would again occupy Jerusalem. That is, people again would go to Heaven. See Jeremiah 32:7-17.

The number 23 points to destruction. This is demonstrated in at least two significant citations in the Bible. One citation records a destructive plague that God sent upon Israel because they began to worship a heathen idol called Baal. As punishment we read in Numbers 25:9:


And those that died in the plague were twenty and four thousand.


Significantly the Bible makes reference to this same plague in the New Testament. We read in 1 Corinthians 10:8:


Neither let us commit fornication, as some of them committed, and fell in one day three and twenty thousand.


Notice God reports the destruction of 24,000 in the Old Testament and 23,000 in the New Testament. This is not a contradiction. A total of 24,000 persons were destroyed, of which 23,000 were destroyed in one day. This highlights the number 23’s association with destruction.

Another emphasis of this association of the number 23 with God’s wrath is found in Daniel 8. There God speaks of a time (which we now know is the first part of the Great Tribulation) lasting 2,300 days, during which Satan would rule over the church and the world as God begins to bring destruction upon the churches, preparing them and the world for Judgment Day. We read in Daniel 8:13-14:


Then I heard one saint speaking, and another saint said unto that certain saint which spake, How long shall be the vision concerning the daily sacrifice, and the transgression of desolation, to give both the sanctuary and the host to be trodden under foot? And he said unto me, Unto two thousand and three hundred days; then shall the sanctuary be cleansed.


By these citations we can understand that the number 3 identifies with God’s purpose, the number 5 with atonement or redemption, the number 10 with completeness, the number 17 with Heaven, and the number 23 with judgment or destruction.

Numbers, like Words, Tell Stories

Individual words give us spiritual meaning. When words are in a paragraph, the information given is greatly emphasized if numbers that have spiritual meaning are associated with the words in that same paragraph or context. For example, we read in 2 Corinthians 2:15-16:


For we are unto God a sweet savour of Christ, in them that are saved, and in them that perish: To the one we are the savour of death unto death; and to the other the savour of life unto life. And who is sufficient for these things?


In these two verses God is describing the effect of the Gospel (which is the Law of God) upon the lives of those who hear it. It will make either of two impacts. It will be used of God to bring eternal life and Heaven to the hearer. Or it will bring the wrath of God because the hearer of the Word of God continued in rebellion against the law of God.

Interestingly this same message of salvation or judgment being the result of the Gospel is hidden in the total number of years the Gospel was to be sent by the churches into the world. We have learned that the church age began immediately after Christ demonstrated how He suffered and died to make payment for sin. That was in the year 33 A.D. We learned that the church age officially began on Pentecost, May 22, 33 A.D. It continued exactly 1,955 full years until May 21, 1988 when the church age came to an end.

The number 1,955 is made up of three prime numbers, each of which can have great spiritual meaning. The numbers are: 5 x 17 x 23 = 1,955.

Thus God by these numbers is echoing or paralleling 2 Corinthians 2:15-16, which is quoted above: 5 (atonement or redemption) times 17 (brings heaven) times 23 (or brings God’s wrath or destruction).

A second significant illustration is given in John 21. In that account the disciples catch 153 big fish in a net that does not break, and which is successfully dragged to shore. It can be shown that these 153 fish represent all those who become saved during the final harvest of true believers that is taking place during the last 6,100 days of the Great Tribulation. Significantly the net does not break, which spiritually indicates that there are no false believers amongst these. These fish represent only true believers. They are the great multitude of people saved after the church age, just before the Day of Judgment. Therefore it is God’s purpose that each and every one is guaranteed to receive the completion of their salvation (they will be brought into Heaven). The number 153 is made of three prime numbers: 3 x 3 x 17 = 153.

These numbers illustrate that it is 3 (the purpose of God) times 3 times 17 (to bring to Heaven) those who are saved during the final days of the Great Tribulation. The 3 (God’s purpose) is doubled to show that this is established by God and will shortly come to pass (see Genesis 41:32). Thus we see how God spiritually supports the written Word with numbers, which are found within the same paragraph or in similar contexts.

What About the Number 722,500?

Let us return now to the 722,500.07 days from April 1, 33 A.D. (the day Christ was crucified and died) until May 21, 2011 (the day when God’s salvation plan has been altogether completed and all of the true believers are brought, or raptured into Heaven).

The number 722,500 is made up of two sets of identical significant numbers. Each number is intimately related to God’s salvation plan:

5 x 10 x 17 x 5 x 10 x 17 = 722,500

The atonement or redemption demonstrated by Christ’s suffering and death on April 1, 33 A.D. (the number 5) is 100% completed on May 21, 2011 (the number 10) when all the true believers are raptured into Heaven (the number 17).

Remarkably this number sequence is doubled, to indicate it has been established by God and will shortly come to pass (Genesis 41:32).

Dear reader, we should be absolutely astonished by what we have just learned. All of this we have learned can only be true because it is the same God who created the universe who has planned this precise timeline of history. Even as the natural laws that permit the sending of a rocket to Mars are absolutely dependable and true, or the laws that govern all of nature are dependable and true, so are the laws that govern the unfolding of God’s timeline.

We must comment further about the incredible nature of this proof which is completely based on Biblical information.

1. April 1, 33 A.D. is the date God focuses our attention on, how Christ died to atone for our sins as Christ was crucified on that day. The number 5 also focuses on that day, inasmuch as it can spiritually signify the atonement.

2. Our salvation is entirely completed at the time believers receive their eternally alive resurrected bodies. This is what happens on the day of the Rapture, May 21, 2011. Thus the period of April 1, 33 A.D. to May 21, 2011 (inclusive) is the complete period from the time God shows us how our salvation was accomplished to the time our salvation has been entirely completed. This coincides perfectly with the number 10, which signifies completeness.

3. On May 21, 2011, the date of the Rapture, each and every saved person goes to Heaven because his salvation is altogether completed. The number 17 fits perfectly because it signifies Heaven when it has spiritual meaning.

4. The doubling of the numbers 5 x 10 x 17 like the doubling of the phrase “a day is as a thousand years” assures us that the truth of these proofs is established by God and will shortly come to pass. Isn’t it amazing that God uses this doubling principle to further guarantee that the date May 21, 2011 is absolutely certain, even as God has used it to absolutely assure us that Judgment Day is exactly 7,000 years after the flood of Noah’s day.

Indeed, in the face of all of this incredible information, how can anyone dare to dispute with the Bible concerning the absolute truth that the beginning of the Day of Judgment together with the Rapture will occur on May 21, 2011.

User avatar
Strauss
Shifting into 6th
Posts: 1950
Joined: August 9th, 2003, 9:12 pm
Location: iCloud
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby Strauss » May 19th, 2011, 2:06 am

I can hear the T2 and T4 machine soundtrack pounding in my head now...

Dut-duuut dut du-dut
Dut-duuut dut du-dut
Dut-duuut dut du-dut

Yea these percussions man...


redmanjp
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 17670
Joined: September 22nd, 2009, 11:01 pm
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby redmanjp » May 19th, 2011, 2:54 am

bluefete wrote:Now with respect to this Rapture happening on May 21, 2011. It is people like Camping who give God a bad name. [b]They even had a full page ad in our Sunday Express just gone. [/b]

http://www.familyradio.com/index2.html



serious!! this cult in trinidad too? :shock: :shock:

redmanjp
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 17670
Joined: September 22nd, 2009, 11:01 pm
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby redmanjp » May 19th, 2011, 1:01 pm

CDC Warns Public to Prepare for 'Zombie Apocalypse'

By Joshua Rhett Miller

Published May 18, 2011

| FoxNews.com

http://www.foxnews.com/health/2011/05/18/cdc-warns-public-prepare-zombie-apocalypse/

Are you prepared for the impending zombie invasion?

That's the question posed by the Centers for Diseases Control and Prevention in a Monday blog posting gruesomely titled, "Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse." And while it's no joke, CDC officials say it's all about emergency preparation.

"There are all kinds of emergencies out there that we can prepare for," the posting reads. "Take a zombie apocalypse for example. That's right, I said z-o-m-b-i-e a-p-o-c-a-l-y-p-s-e. You may laugh now, but when it happens you'll be happy you read this, and hey, maybe you'll even learn a thing or two about how to prepare for a real emergency."

The post, written by Assistant Surgeon General Ali Khan, instructs readers how to prepare for "flesh-eating zombies" much like how they appeared in Hollywood hits like "Night of the Living Dead" and video games like Resident Evil. Perhaps surprisingly, the same steps you'd take in preparation for an onslaught of ravenous monsters are similar to those suggested in advance of a hurricane or pandemic.

"First of all, you should have an emergency kit in your house," the posting continues. "This includes things like water, food, and other supplies to get you through the first couple of days before you can locate a zombie-free refugee camp (or in the event of a natural disaster, it will buy you some time until you are able to make your way to an evacuation shelter or utility lines are restored)."

Other items to be stashed in such a kit include medications, duct tape, a battery-powered radio, clothes, copies of important documents and first aid supplies.

"Once you've made your emergency kit, you should sit down with your family and come up with an emergency plan," the posting continues. "This includes where you would go and who you would call if zombies started appearing outside your doorstep. You can also implement this plan if there is a flood, earthquake or other emergency."

The idea behind the campaign stemmed from concerns of radiation fears following the earthquake and tsunami that rocked Japan in March. CDC spokesman Dave Daigle told FoxNews.com that someone had asked CDC officials if zombies would be a concern due to radiation fears in Japan and traffic spiked following that mention.

Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/health/2011/05/1 ... z1MooTnFH3

User avatar
Dizzy28
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 18919
Joined: February 8th, 2010, 8:54 am
Location: People's Republic of Bananas

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby Dizzy28 » May 19th, 2011, 1:05 pm

After many hours of on Call of Duty Zombie maps I feel i know how to prepare for a Zombie invasion: - Get Jug A ***
- Get Speed Cola
- Pack A Punch guns (I prefer the Galil and Thundergun)
- Keep Running

User avatar
rollingstock
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 17931
Joined: June 29th, 2009, 8:21 am
Location: Ain't got no chill!

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby rollingstock » May 19th, 2011, 1:24 pm

De Phoq and i still a virgin :(

ImageImageImageImageImage

User avatar
AllTrac
TriniTuner Crew
Posts: 19989
Joined: April 17th, 2003, 11:43 pm
Location: iymc
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby AllTrac » May 19th, 2011, 1:27 pm

where?? :S

User avatar
Yeo
TunerGod
Posts: 26422
Joined: May 12th, 2003, 7:36 pm
Location: Far Rockaway, NY
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby Yeo » May 19th, 2011, 1:46 pm

lostallos101 wrote:For example, Dec. 21, 2012 marks the end of the 5,125-year-long cycle in the Mesoamerican Long Count calendar, leading some people – particularly those who believe that the dating systems of pre-Columbian Americans can predict events hundreds of years in the future – to believe that the world will end on that date
2012mayan.jpg
2012mayan.jpg (52.27 KiB) Viewed 2383 times

redmanjp
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 17670
Joined: September 22nd, 2009, 11:01 pm
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby redmanjp » May 19th, 2011, 1:53 pm

^^some people can't wait for that date, so they brought it up to May 21 2011

User avatar
mitsuboi
Riding on 17's
Posts: 1420
Joined: August 25th, 2009, 8:42 pm
Location: southzone
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby mitsuboi » May 19th, 2011, 2:55 pm

‎​
Another bbm circulation

Satan was once gloating & boasting. "Yes, sir, I just caught a world full of people. I set a trap, used bait I knew they couldn't resist. Got 'em all!

"What re u going 2 do wit them?" Jesus asked. Satan replied, "Oh, I'm gonna ave fun! I'm gonna teach them how 2 marry & divorce each other, how 2 hate & abuse each other, how 2 drink & smoke & curse.

I'm gonna teach them how to invent guns and bombs and kill each other. I'm really gonna have fun!

"And what will you do when you are done with them?" Jesus asked."Oh, I'll kill 'em," Satan glared proudly.

"How much do u want for them? "Jesus asked."Oh, u don't want those people. They ain't no good. Why, u'll take them & they'll just hate u. They'll spit on u, curse u & kill u. U don't want those people!"

"How much? He asked again.Satan looked at Jesus and sneered, "All ur blood, tears & ur life."Jesus said, "DONE!" Then He paid the price.


Note: Isn't it funny how simple it is 4 people 2 trash God and then wonder why the world's going the way it is?

Isn't it funny how someone can say "I believe in God" but still follow Satan?

Isn't it funny how u can send a thousand jokes through e-mail & they spread like wildfire, but when u start sending messages regarding God and goodness, people think twice about sharing?


Isn't it funny how we can be more worried about what other people think of us than what God thinks of us?

Jonathan
Sweet on this forum
Posts: 320
Joined: July 18th, 2005, 11:05 am

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby Jonathan » May 19th, 2011, 3:07 pm

Somebody say zombie apocalypse?? :lol:

• rapture tip #1. Do not drink any Kool-Aid if you did not prepare it yourself.
• rapture tip #2. Disregard any “rapture” churches which ask you to agree to yearly contributions or have pamphlets detailing summer events.
• rapture tip #3. When spaceships begin to appear in the sky, do not flee to L.A. Tom Cruise and Will Smith are actors and cannot help you.
• rapture tip #4. If you feel inclined to give away your worldly possessions ... please contact me, I can definitely help you with that.
• rapture tip #5. Do not approach zombies even if you know them. That is not your Aunt Edna and she doesn’t want a hug ... she wants your brains.
• rapture tip #6. Protocol is to run screaming into the streets and get hit by cars. This is post-rapture population control for the rest of us.

• rapture tip #7. Post-apocalyptic concert will be held at Sazerac in Asheville. Bouncers will be stopping zombies at the door. Please bring
your pulse.
• rapture tip #8. Concert is free, but you must know all lyrics to REM’s “End of the World.” Just shouting “Leonard Bernstein” is not acceptable.
• rapture tip #9 Rosanne Cash will be headlining our concert. : ) All reports that Elvis will be performing are false ... at this time.
• rapture tip #10. Mark Wahlberg may make an appearance with The Funky Bunch if we can ascertain that hell has indeed frozen by concert time.
• rapture tip #11. Once again ... DO NOT DRINK ANY KOOL-AID YOU HAVE NOT PREPARED YOURSELF. And also avoid the brown acid. Dude, seriously.
• rapture tip #12. Do not listen to any “preachers” who insist god is talking directly to them. God only talks to me ... and Steve Martin.
• rapture tip #13. To fully prepare yourself for life without power, gas or computers, please obtain a copy ofThe Amish Guide to Living.

• rapture tip #14. Please note The Amish Guide to Living is not available for the Kindle or Sony Reader. It is only compatible with the
Nook.
• rapture tip #15. It is not acceptable to enslave an Amish person post-rapture, any more than it is acceptable to own a Canadian.
• rapture tip #16. U.S. currency and electronic devices will not be useful post-rapture. keep this in mind when writing out your “to-loot” list.
• rapture tip #17. Not everyone is aware U.S. currency will be worthless. Keep this in mind when directing others to the “best looting places.”
• rapture tip #18. Please form orderly lines when setting riot bonfires. Matches will be a rarity in a few months. Let’s try to conserve them.
• rapture tip #19. If you find yourself in a building during the Apocalypse, exits will be located ... pretty much everywhere.
• rapture tip #20. Now is the time to buy stock in Kool-Aid, just make sure you cash out and purchase livestock on May 20 or you’re screwed.
• rapture tip 21. Bunkers should not be made of biodegradable materials. People, this is not the time to go green.
• rapture tip 22. Make sure to have marshmallows on hand. When the world explodes it’s going to be one hell of a fire.
• rapture tip 23. Repeat after me, “Screw you, Grandma, you’re not getting into my bunker without your own provisions.”
• rapture tip 24. Forget the golden rule. The rapture means never having to say you’re sorry.
• rapture tip 25. For heaven’s sake bring extra can openers into your bunker.
• rapture tip 26. Do not approach Paul McCartney or Elvis ... we have still not determined if either are alive or will be returning as zombies.
• rapture tip 27. When looting don’t forget Burgess Meredith in Twilight Zone ... steal extra pairs of glasses.
• rapture tip 28. Gather up as many pets as possible to keep in your bunker. 2 feet good, 4 feet bad.
• rapture tip 29. Remember, that which does not kill you must make you stronger than your neighbor, unless you have firearms.
• rapture tip 30. Essential bunker reference materials: The Lord of the Flies, Anarchist’s Cookbook and The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.
• rapture tip 31. If you forget everything else, remember ... soylent green is people.
• rapture tip 32. The old adage is true ... you don’t have to run fast, just faster than the guy who was ahead of you.
• rapture tip 33. It is perfectly acceptable to scream like a little girl when approached by a gang of zombies. It isn’t helpful, but it is acceptable.
• rapture tip 34. Sacrificing virgins is a pagan ritual, this particular god won’t be swayed by a screaming, bikini-clad co-ed.
• rapture tip 35. Watching the “Thriller” video is not zombie research just as watching “E.T.” will not prepare you for dealing with our alien overlords.
• rapture tip 36. Eternity is a hell of a long time ... bring playing cards and condoms.
• rapture tip 37. Do not kill other people when looting and rioting this will only increase the zombie population.
• rapture tip 38. People, please remember, DON’T DRINK THE KOOL-AID!
• rapture tip 39. Do not get into a handbasket unless you are confident you are ready to go to hell.
• rapture tip 40. If you are “taken” on Saturday, it is considered uncouth to shout “I told you so” to those left behind.
• rapture tip 41. The “left behind” movie series is not factually accurate. do not take orders from kirk cameron.
• rapture tip 42. If you find yourself face to face with a group of zombies, do not yell “eat me” ... they don’t understand sarcasm.
• rapture tip 43. All our handbaskets are eco-friendly and will explode at the shores of the River Styx. Please exit quickly.
• rapture tip 44. Truism: that which does not kill you won’t really matter after Saturday.
• rapture tip 45. Please keep hands and feet in the handbasket until we reach hell ... oh, never mind.
• rapture tip 46. Please refrain from smoking while in the handbasket ... unless you are on fire.
• rapture tip 47. There is no food allowed in the handbaskets, so please do not share your basket with a zombie.
• rapture tip 48. Raid will not kill the swarms of locusts, although recent testing indicates that Axe Body Spray will disintegrate them.
• rapture tip 49. Your best chance of survival is the buddy system. Please, if you become a zombie, do not eat your buddy.
• rapture tip 50. If you do not own firearms, make sure to locate a god-fearing neighbor who does.
• rapture tip 51. Do not feed the stallions which are carrying the four horsemen of the Apocalypse. You don’t want to piss off death.
• rapture tip 52. On Oct. 21 the world will explode. Do not bend over and kiss your ass good-bye ... it just looks stupid.
• rapture tip 53. Everybody, say it with me ... DO NOT DRINK THE KOOL-AID! : )

rossi
punchin NOS
Posts: 2954
Joined: May 31st, 2004, 11:52 pm

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby rossi » May 19th, 2011, 6:17 pm

^ 53 really?

User avatar
megadoc1
punchin NOS
Posts: 3261
Joined: January 9th, 2006, 7:33 pm
Location: advancing the kingdom of heaven

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby megadoc1 » May 19th, 2011, 7:53 pm

mitsuboi wrote:‎​
Another bbm circulation

Satan was once gloating & boasting. "Yes, sir, I just caught a world full of people. I set a trap, used bait I knew they couldn't resist. Got 'em all!

"What re u going 2 do wit them?" Jesus asked. Satan replied, "Oh, I'm gonna ave fun! I'm gonna teach them how 2 marry & divorce each other, how 2 hate & abuse each other, how 2 drink & smoke & curse.

I'm gonna teach them how to invent guns and bombs and kill each other. I'm really gonna have fun!

"And what will you do when you are done with them?" Jesus asked."Oh, I'll kill 'em," Satan glared proudly.

"How much do u want for them? "Jesus asked."Oh, u don't want those people. They ain't no good. Why, u'll take them & they'll just hate u. They'll spit on u, curse u & kill u. U don't want those people!"

"How much? He asked again.Satan looked at Jesus and sneered, "All ur blood, tears & ur life."Jesus said, "DONE!" Then He paid the price.


I like this...... the price is paid, over paid



rossi
punchin NOS
Posts: 2954
Joined: May 31st, 2004, 11:52 pm

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby rossi » May 19th, 2011, 8:20 pm

ONE MORE DAY!!!!! Oh gaaaad!!!!!

User avatar
Duane 3NE 2NR
Admin
Posts: 28741
Joined: March 24th, 2003, 10:27 am
Location: T&T
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby Duane 3NE 2NR » May 20th, 2011, 12:31 pm

lol even Weather Channel on this thing
Attachments
weather-forecast.jpeg
weather-forecast.jpeg (30.93 KiB) Viewed 2317 times

User avatar
noshownogo
punchin NOS
Posts: 4379
Joined: January 6th, 2004, 11:51 am
Location: heavy petting!
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby noshownogo » May 20th, 2011, 1:07 pm

:rofl: "chance of apocalypse - 100%"

User avatar
Bizzare
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 10873
Joined: June 2nd, 2010, 12:26 pm
Location: I'm in it

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby Bizzare » May 20th, 2011, 1:10 pm

Can someone confirm this? I haz a few fantasies that must be fulfilled.

S_2NR
TriniTuner 24-7
Posts: 13305
Joined: May 22nd, 2010, 8:11 pm

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby S_2NR » May 20th, 2011, 1:24 pm

:lol: :lol:
666 degrees lmao

User avatar
geodude
Riding on 18's
Posts: 1770
Joined: February 21st, 2009, 1:22 am
Location: Hiding from the Chuna spelling police
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby geodude » May 20th, 2011, 1:54 pm

like omg

User avatar
slimshiney
Sweet on this forum
Posts: 376
Joined: May 14th, 2005, 8:30 pm

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby slimshiney » May 20th, 2011, 3:49 pm

......... :? :? :? On May 21st Harold Camping will just be added to the list who make their unfullfilled prophecies.......

User avatar
TRAE
punchin NOS
Posts: 4390
Joined: December 15th, 2008, 2:47 pm
Location: South!
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby TRAE » May 20th, 2011, 3:52 pm

so which chick wanna f*ck before tomorrow

User avatar
geodude
Riding on 18's
Posts: 1770
Joined: February 21st, 2009, 1:22 am
Location: Hiding from the Chuna spelling police
Contact:

Re: Countdown to JUDGEMENT DAY May 21ST 2011

Postby geodude » May 20th, 2011, 3:57 pm

tonight would be a good night to hit the clubs

Advertisement

Return to “Ole talk and more Ole talk”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 23 guests