South soap opera nonsense...

[S_2NR]

whats the pt of a serious relationship..if its gonna end anyway..and normally one or both parties involved end up devastated.
what goes up must come down.

[rollingstock]

The virtues of being dirt poor, i have nothing to offer or lose but a semi hard p3nis

[TobagoAK]

You can't be too nice to them. You need to rough them up once in awhile, not usually physically but enough to instill boundaries and to let them know that you are not a peep squeak.

Never love a woman more than she loves or else you may quickly find your self becoming a door mat.

[rossi]

No offense to ppl actually living IN Barrackpore

I was bored....

[eurogirl]

You can't be too nice to them. You need to rough them up once in awhile, not usually physically but enough to instill boundaries and to let them know that you are not a peep squeak.

Never love a woman more than she loves or else you may quickly find your self becoming a door mat.

R you for real ?

what madness I does be reading ?

The virtues of being dirt poor, i have nothing to offer or lose but a semi hard p3nis

u need viagra

whats the pt of a serious relationship..if its gonna end anyway..and normally one or both parties involved end up devastated.
what goes up must come down.

What's the point of talking to a next human being then ??

Spike bro, as usual, many lessons to be learned from your write ups here.

I am actually afraid to be in a relationship these days. It seems the modern version of "relationship" is expected to have within it cheating et al.

Where has a simple relationship gone? I'm 28 and I think I am too old for all the commess and games. I hear stories like this all the time. *sigh*

being 28 doesn't mean anything , all it means is that you are too self centered and prob sheltered .. simple and relationship never goes hand in hand ...



Come on guysssss ... this is 1 woman ONE !!! woman .. why are you all weary of every single woman out there now ??? This is why muffler bearings suceed !! this is why the nice guys never get a chance !!!

you all really need to understand life isn't simple anymore , its not about " THE ONE " its about teaching us how to find the one ... or someone that cloesly resembles your "one" ..

We're not lucky like our parents , go a bazaar and meet a girl and boom!!! soulmate forever .. or fall in love with the nieghbour daughter and run away .. Its not that simple anymore ...so unless u learn to adapt you will be stuck with getting screwed over .. I really feel for the guy in the story ,but , lets face it some ppl aren't strong enough to fight back .

[ismithx]

d Spike, Bollywood calling for movie rights!

yuh make ah mistake Duane, is not bollywood, is Lifetime Movies

[d spike]

whats the pt of a serious relationship..if its gonna end anyway..and normally one or both parties involved end up devastated.
what goes up must come down.

The virtues of being dirt poor, i have nothing to offer or lose but a semi hard p3nis

Good grief.
(flexes fingers..."this needs must be said")

Materialism (the love of acquisition) has taken over the way people think. It guides their decision-making, forms their value system. It certainly does affect the types and quality of relationships that you form.
We are here for a time. With this in mind, one’s outlook in relationships can be affected in one of two ways by materialism: Presumption or Despair.

Presumption, in this regard, is the unspoken belief that you will never age and die - a materialistic immortality as it were. While this sounds like an utterly foolish thing to think, it is actually the lack of thinking about it that creates this… avoidance of one’s humanity. This causes one to have recurring superficial relationships, each one only different as the choice of partner – but no depth, no sharing, no learning. This is due to the core of materialism: pleasure oneself. It never occurs that a time will come when certain forms of pleasure fade in the autumn of our lives, leaving behind the deeper pleasure (and the only truly real pleasure) of knowing and being with another – companionship. This joy one finds in another is why it is human to seek out another. This joy is what binds a true couple – sex is merely a catalyst. If there is no bond, the sex, while very pleasurable, will not hold the two together. Sex builds on this joy, aiding in its growth and depth… hence the reason why casual sex is problematic – two people subconsciously working together to build something that they don’t wish to exist… and at the end of it all, your life is full of little ghost towns you sweetly gloss over as “experience”…

Despair is the “realization” that whatever you have to offer will always be bettered by someone else. That everyone else’s choices is purely governed by what they can get out of their choice of person… a vampiric way of looking at life if you ask me… each one a parasite, moving from host to host, leaving behind a husk – who chalks it up to “experience”. This causes one to expect an end in a relationship before it even exists… causing one to set his sights too low (why aim higher? You will only miss…) and look for “partners” among the dregs of life… these very dregs, who believe exactly as you do, and so use you – before you use them – leaving you with less than before (but with more “experience”)…

Look closely at these two choices of outlook, apart from the former having a positive façade and the other being truly negative, THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE. The result is still the same.
Some may argue that there is a third state: Apathy… however this is not really a choice, but rather the inability to make a choice. Stasis is not life, but a withholding of life… a temporary “timeout” from our journey. Just bear in mind that while one can withdraw into this seemingly protective shell of avoiding choices, time still moves. Withdrawing from life actually takes away from it, leaving you with less.

At the end of the materialist’s life, whichever choice he has made, he is left with nothing, just empty, unfulfilled “experiences” (and they LOVE to boast about their “wealth of experiences”) – not true experiences of what life had to offer, but fake and false light impressions of fleeting pleasure, perhaps glimpses of joy seen from afar, but underlying all, pain… the pain of absence... the absence of joy. This old husk that had all the life sucked out of it, and all the true wealth that life had to offer denied to it, is the end result of materialism. To end on a sterile cot, surrounded by unfeeling machines and a professional nurse, as compared to a bed rumpled by great-grandkids, surrounded by loved ones… this too shows what materialism truly affords… for the end of life is just as important as any other part of the journey.

For those who are religious, they realize that this is another way evil can attack and destroy humans, by sucking out their humanity, leaving them mere wrecks to drift through life, dead before their time.
For we are here to be part of the creation around us, to revel in its beauty and each other – to truly experience what life has to offer, the joy of sharing all of it with someone else.

Five-year olds at a friend’s birthday party, run around screaming, cramming themselves full of sweets and candy, making noise, mess… as only five-year olds can. Apart from the assortment of bus’ heads, squeezed fingers, vomit-stained clothes, and the suspicious heap of turd-like matter behind the couch… fun was had… Now, ask yourself: does this change as we get older? Shouldn't it?

Cheers

[S_2NR]

whats the pt of a serious relationship..if its gonna end anyway..and normally one or both parties involved end up devastated.
what goes up must come down.

What's the point of talking to a next human being then ??

i never said avoid relationships..
just dont get sprung..
in every relationship, the person who cares less always have more power..

and ppl not weary about all women bcuz of 'this one woman'. plenty woman jus like this.
and doh come with this "nice guy" talk..
girls dont go for that anyway..

[brams112]

these things only happen down south?and within one race?ha ha ha some people real dotish when it comes to life oui,this happens all over just with diffrent results,that is why in the story the other man was practicing his fighting skills,all greedy women get their rewards sooner orr later,,,,,,,,, bois

[S_2NR]

d spike.. wat is ur occupation? lawyer, writer, movie director?

[brams112]

the man write a clean and to the point story dey ent,,,,,,,^^^

[d spike]

You can't be too nice to them. You need to rough them up once in awhile, not usually physically but enough to instill boundaries and to let them know that you are not a peep squeak.

Never love a woman more than she loves or else you may quickly find your self becoming a door mat.

R you for real ?

what madness I does be reading ?

The virtues of being dirt poor, i have nothing to offer or lose but a semi hard p3nis

u need viagra

whats the pt of a serious relationship..if its gonna end anyway..and normally one or both parties involved end up devastated.
what goes up must come down.

What's the point of talking to a next human being then ??

A little brutal, but quite right.

I am actually afraid to be in a relationship these days. It seems the modern version of "relationship" is expected to have within it cheating et al.

Where has a simple relationship gone? I'm 28 and I think I am too old for all the commess and games. I hear stories like this all the time. *sigh*

being 28 doesn't mean anything , all it means is that you are too self centered and prob sheltered .. simple and relationship never goes hand in hand ...

Ouch... way too brutal... (an' de box lancer man goes down, hit by stray pellets from the simultaneous firing of both barrels of eurogirl's shotgun)
Being 28 (and maintaining the claimed point of view of fearing to be in a relationship) simply means that Zodi has become jaded at a young age... 30 is normally the approximate age where an adult's world-view matures - note I said "normally". Adolescent "love" and its heady relationships are transient, a little bumpy, but they guide us to look further, for more... and teach us to recognize and avoid the pitfalls of forming relationships built only on superficial matters - if we learn from them.
If one doesn't learn from them, then one can easily become one of the two types I described in my previous post.
The opposite swing of the pendulum is one whose life is too busy (or sheltered?) to form such early relationships... a matured and sensible world-view can be acquired in time - for life does go on - but without being able to spot the snakes in the grass, makes one easily become a victim to opportunistic users who are intelligent enough to identify and use one's "blind-spots" to their own advantage... as was the case in the original post.

Come on guysssss ... this is 1 woman ONE !!! woman .. why are you all weary of every single woman out there now ??? This is why muffler bearings suceed !! this is why the nice guys never get a chance !!!

It depends on how sensitive one might be, how open one was to such a woman...
One can get burnt... and get burned so badly, that getting back up is seen as pointless. A man can be beaten bloody by a pack of fools and survive, but all it takes to kill him is one well-placed barb to pierce his heart.
You shouldn't assume that Zodiaque has never had some truly wretched experiences at the hands of some of those man-trapping females you very well know prowl around out there - simply because he didn't mention it. Yes, all Zodi needs is to find his "One"... but if he is too scared, or just too fed-up of the jackals that are out there, then he won't even try. A terse, "Man up, boy... life stinks, learn to stand the smell" instruction isn't going to cut it.
There's nothing wrong with a simple (read "uncomplicated") relationship. It is because of folks' materialistic lifestyles that cause relationships to become "complicated". Think about it.

you all really need to understand life isn't simple anymore , its not about " THE ONE " its about teaching us how to find the one ... or someone that cloesly resembles your "one" ..

We're not lucky like our parents , go a bazaar and meet a girl and boom!!! soulmate forever .. or fall in love with the nieghbour daughter and run away .. Its not that simple anymore ...so unless u learn to adapt you will be stuck with getting screwed over .. I really feel for the guy in the story ,but , lets face it some ppl aren't strong enough to fight back .

While two concepts are being slightly confused, you are still quite right here. However, society used to put pressure on couples to "make it work". Thanks to our modern materialistic lifestyle, that pressure no longer exists. "Take what you want and leave" is far too prevalent nowadays.
It can be argued that, before, couples who should not have paired off but did so, were forced to remain together, causing a lifetime of bitterness and problems...
However, now there is very little to encourage two people who, at one time thought they were a team, to stay together and stand side by side, dealing with whatever life throws at them. It seems now that the "sensible" thing to do is to bail out first, leaving someone else to steady the damaged craft... So comparing the long-term relationships of now to those of the past is not really fair... unless by adapting you mean being able to spot and ignore the opportunists - which is precisely what adolescent relationships were supposed to teach you in the first place.

(As an aside - for those that didn't know - Wallerfield was named after the chief officer and pilot of a "flying boat" in WWII used to spot submarines, that was shot down early in the war. He opted to remain behind in the cockpit to steady the plummeting craft, allowing all the other members of the crew to successfully bail out first - it was nine of them, I think. He didn't get a chance to get out safely.)

[nareshseep]

damn this story sounds very similar about a padner of mines...

edit
it is mih padner damn .... hope everything is cool with him now... did not know he was going through all this... man still pull through and got his degree... woh!

[brams112]

boi now some women want every thing they see,some men try to accomplish lots of things for his family,they end up being the bad one,wife says he doh have time for we,,,yet still she spending his money like she wild,horn is just a laugh now,long time women and men used to hide, now they doing it in the open, that is why we have plenty guest houses now with hourly rates,,,

[TobagoAK]

Another possibility is of the modern state of relationships is the influx of the American media bombarded throughout your radio and TV screen 24/7. When you ask some people what they about monogamy, they stare at you like you're talking about a piece of wood. Everybody wants to live this fast life, dressup in the lastest fashion and drive the flyest car.

Nothing is inherently wrong with wanting these things but it makes alot of "regular" people feel that they HAVE get to these things and that they are a nobody if they don't have them, when they really don't know that its only hard work that bring these rewards.

Trinidad and Tobago is no longer an isolated "box" like when our grand parents grew up. Thanks to TV and internet our general way of life is slowly being transformed into the pseudo materialistic state that is America, and picking up their bad habits as well.

Whenever I come for vacation, its like I just went to a different city. Doesn't have that unique home feel like as I was young but alas:

"I know everything must change but ah still love mi ole time days"

[d spike]

d spike.. wat is ur occupation? lawyer, writer, movie director?

I extort funds under false pretenses...
do a bit of arzekratching on the side...
the grandiose verbage is due to a bad habit of mine (ah does boil dictionaries an' drink de tea... )

[VexXx Dogg]

Damn, dred this man had it hard.
Now honestly, this is only one side of the story as painted by one individual.
The devil's advocate in me would have liked to hear the other side...

[d spike]

Another possibility is of the modern state of relationships is the influx of the American media bombarded throughout your radio and TV screen 24/7. When you ask some people what they about monogamy, they stare at you like you're talking about a piece of wood. Everybody wants to live this fast life, dressup in the lastest fashion and drive the flyest car.

Nothing is inherently wrong with wanting these things but it makes alot of "regular" people feel that they HAVE get to these things and that they are a nobody if they don't have them, when they really don't know that its only hard work that bring these rewards.

Trinidad and Tobago is no longer an isolated "box" like when our grand parents grew up. Thanks to TV and internet our general way of life is slowly being transformed into the pseudo materialistic state that is America, and picking up their bad habits as well.

Correctamundo. This is referred to as materialism.

Nothing is inherently wrong with wanting these things but it makes alot of "regular" people feel that they HAVE get to these things and that they are a nobody if they don't have them, when they really don't know that its only hard work that bring these rewards.

Not really so, I'm afraid. While nothing is wrong with wanting to have something ('want' is neither good or bad) the problem lies in "why" the "want" exists... Why do you want it? If you have a car that does all that it has to do, why do you want another one? Materialism/consumerism teaches us that we "need" to go faster (to thus use our time more efficiently), we need to "maintain our status" (so to enable our children to go to the "right" schools, for us to mix with the "right" people), and a host of seemingly sensible reasons... all of which will make no difference in the long run regarding what is truly important in life - except just make it harder for us to recognize them.

There is nothing wrong with bettering oneself... but it must not come at the expense of those you love... and those you need to concern yourself about.

[d spike]

in every relationship, the person who cares less always have more power..

I would hate to be in a relationship where it is important "who has more power"... this is clearly a materialistic relationship, where control, dominance and "power" is more important than caring.
A true relationship based on love is one of sharing... skills, talents, abilities... all "belong" to the pair... You serve each other... Love flows both ways, making up for whatever is lacking.

[TobagoAK]

Couldn't agree with you more. Wanting those things is essentially a status thing oui. However/but if you are super rich then I can see how you would want these things as a reflection of your wealth.

However since its the super rich that usually have the flyest cars etc, and comfortably afford them, they put that sheit on tv and basically ram it down your throat as to say that if you have these things you will have status, you will be a somebody.

This is where you see the average person "running "down these things down.......for status. Think about how much money the rich have and what they spend it on. If a man have $1 000,000 and buy a car for $100,000. That is chump change to he. He still super rich.

Now say you have a man $200,000 and buy that same car for $100,000..........half di money gone right dey. They man with $200,000 could have simply bought a car that cost $10,000 and still retain over 90% of his wealth.

So that's where the status thing comes into play. The $100,000 car and $10,000 will both take you to di same place just the cheaper doesn't look as nice.

Even up here is di same ting. People driving Mercedes Benz an living in public housing. Or average niggaz who drive BMW's but can't put een more than $20 dollars gas at a time and still live with their moms.

Its not about how much you make, it's about how much you save.

[eurogirl]

whats the pt of a serious relationship..if its gonna end anyway..and normally one or both parties involved end up devastated.
what goes up must come down.

What's the point of talking to a next human being then ??

i never said avoid relationships..
just dont get sprung..
in every relationship, the person who cares less always have more power..

and ppl not weary about all women bcuz of 'this one woman'. plenty woman jus like this.
and doh come with this "nice guy" talk..
girls dont go for that anyway..

Did you just quote a movie line there for me ?? A very stupid line that may cause thousands of shallow ppl to actually put that sentence to full use ?!

Nice guys are around .. they just need to keep up some ah them a bit slow

However, now there is very little to encourage two people who, at one time thought they were a team, to stay together and stand side by side, dealing with whatever life throws at them. It seems now that the "sensible" thing to do is to bail out first, leaving someone else to steady the damaged craft... So comparing the long-term relationships of now to those of the past is not really fair... unless by adapting you mean being able to spot and ignore the opportunists - which is precisely what adolescent relationships were supposed to teach you in the first place.

I agree with this .. even the older folk falling for this ,which is sad ..

You shouldn't assume that Zodiaque has never had some truly wretched experiences at the hands of some of those man-trapping females you very well know prowl around out there - simply because he didn't mention it. Yes, all Zodi needs is to find his "One"... but if he is too scared, or just too fed-up of the jackals that are out there, then he won't even try. A terse, "Man up, boy... life stinks, learn to stand the smell" instruction isn't going to cut it.

man trapping ?? lol ... Why are assuming men get trapped ? I never seen anyman being shangied into a relationship before unno . Underneath it all the person ( man or woman ) must like the person to be around them .

Zodi , I'm sorry you think its harsh . Its really not harsh advice ... its honest bareballs truth .. my best friend has the same problem and he tells me I'm insane coz I push him past boundaries and limits he not accustom breaking ( mama's boy seirous mama's boy !) sometimes, I just push him down ledges and hills for kicks so he can get an adrenaline rush without having to think about what he's about to do .Due to his over analyzing , guess what he's stuck in love with a married woman . He over analyze till the point of no return . He wishes he can find someone else yet he goes back to her coz guess what .. he so afraid of being hurt with other ppl he rather be hurt by her .He knows he can deal with tht pain .

[d spike]

Damn, dred this man had it hard.
Now honestly, this is only one side of the story as painted by one individual.

Honestly... no.
Unless by "other side" you meant what she would have had to say. Someone earlier posted a link to a newspaper website where something along this line was stated. While it was written by someone who "painted" her "side", that person was a stranger to the truth.
I ensured that what I wrote was true. If you don't believe it, say so. Nothing is "painted" here - feel free to find out for yourself. Others have done their own digging, and they have not realized anything dissimilar to what I have stated.

[d spike]

Couldn't agree with you more. Wanting those things is essentially a status thing oui. However/but if you are super rich then I can see how you would want these things as a reflection of your wealth....

Its not about how much you make, it's about how much you save.

All that is referred to as "Materialism".

There is nothing wrong with bettering oneself... but it must not come at the expense of those you love... and those you need to concern yourself about.

[speedaholic]

Spike bro, as usual, many lessons to be learned from your write ups here.

I am actually afraid to be in a relationship these days. It seems the modern version of "relationship" is expected to have within it cheating et al.

Where has a simple relationship gone? I'm 28 and I think I am too old for all the commess and games. I hear stories like this all the time. *sigh*

ent bwoydanbwoyorsebwoy!

[d spike]

man trapping ?? lol ... Why are assuming men get trapped ? I never seen anyman being shangied into a relationship before unno . Underneath it all the person ( man or woman ) must like the person to be around them .

I'm not assuming. Both personal experience and knowing others caught in the same pit have taught me that men (and women) can get "shanghaied" into a relationship - but only where they are under pressure to stay... so they have no choice but to stay (or so they may think.) That pressure can be very real to the person who respects its source, be it religion, family, or their perception of what others think.

in every relationship, the person who cares less always have more power..

I would hate to be in a relationship where it is important "who has more power"... this is clearly a materialistic relationship, where control, dominance and "power" is more important than caring.
A true relationship based on love is one of sharing... skills, talents, abilities... all "belong" to the pair... You serve each other... Love flows both ways, making up for whatever is lacking.

It is all too possible to be in a relationship where you are doing and giving all you can but the other person, being an Opportunist, doesn't respond... or responds just enough to lead you to hope that more will be forthcoming.

I'm afraid you yourself put it very nicely:

Nice guys are around .. they just need to keep up some ah them a bit slow

It's not the fast prey that get pulled down by predators... it's the slow ones.

not being able to spot the snakes in the grass, makes one easily become a victim to opportunistic users who are intelligent enough to identify and use one's "blind-spots" to their own advantage... as was the case in the original post.

[lostallos101]

everything stated above about materialism leading the world of relationships are true because if you look at the world now...its all you see

for example, it has a guy livin in calif....really rich, has all the the best rides, latest fashion, wife rocking level plastic and have diamond this and that but are they happy? from your view you would think they had it all and happiest people ever but behind the closed door, you would realise they are actually the unhappiest people...there is truth in the saying "money doesn't buy happiness"....has has a rolls royce but drives around in his old mustang he built up for himself...y? because it brought him joy....his kids has every imaginable toy but still find fun in playing with cards....its the simple things in life that is worth everything and that goes the same for relationships....its not how much stuff you have or how big your house is but the memories created together that should mean everything

[AllTrac]

the one who loves less is the one in control - The Ingrate.

this is VERY very true. Ive always been in control.

[S_2NR]

*googles ingrate*


But how can someone "love less"

Ent is either yu love someone or u dont?

[RapToR]

[S_2NR]

Thats not love.. Thats infatuation.