stalest joke competiition

[Mike2]

how do u call a jamaican cashier







a booyakashier

[TEMPO]

A blonde walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist for some bottom deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman that they don't sell anything called bottom deodorant, and never have. Unfazed, the blonde assures him that she has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis, and would like some more. "I'm sorry," says the pharmacist, "we don't have any."

"But I always get it here," says the blonde.

"Do you have the container it comes in?"

"Yes!" says the blonde, "I will go and get it."

She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist, who looks at it and says to her, "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant."

The annoyed blonde snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container: "To apply, push up bottom."

[rspann]

What did Jean-Claude say after his Hi-lux shut down for the third time?






Damme van!

[kadijahveronica]

did you hear about the gold fish that went bankrupt






now he's a bronze fish
DAH DUM TSSKK!!!

[TRAE]

ever hear the joke bout the bed?



it eh make up yet

[ar05ant]

Rofl

[DJShortCircuit]

what is a good song to sing while cutting your lawn?





Waka waka, eh eh

[TEMPO]

what is a good song to sing while cutting your lawn?





Waka waka, eh eh

take winn !

[HaRdCoRe_YoUtH]

A blonde walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist for some bottom deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman that they don't sell anything called bottom deodorant, and never have. Unfazed, the blonde assures him that she has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis, and would like some more. "I'm sorry," says the pharmacist, "we don't have any."

"But I always get it here," says the blonde.

"Do you have the container it comes in?"

"Yes!" says the blonde, "I will go and get it."

She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist, who looks at it and says to her, "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant."

The annoyed blonde snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container: "To apply, push up bottom."

I read that crap in a book in the indian expo...

[RedTiger]

A bus and maxi taxi was involved in an accident on the busy Priority Bus Route on a Friday afternoon.

As expected, traffic came to a stand-still, and a large vocal crowd gathered. A male reporter from one of our 'big' newspapers, anxious to get his story could not get near the bus or the victim(s). Being a clever person, he started shouting loudly, " Unnuh let me through! Let me through! Ah mi mi madda get lick-dung. "

The crowd made way for him. Lying in front of the bus was a donkey.

[Spitfir3]

^

A nursery school teacher says to her class,“Who can use the word ‘definitely’ in a sentence?”
First a little girl says “The sky is definitely blue.”
The teacher says, “Sorry Amy,but the sky can sometimes be gray or black.”

A second little boy says “Trees are definitely green.”
“Sorry, but in the autumn trees are brown.”

Then little Johnny from the back of the class stands up and asks “Does a fart have lumps?”
The teacher looks horrified and says “Johnny! Of course not!!”

“OK…then I DEFINITELY sheit my pants!”

[Spitfir3]

A blonde lady was driving along the highway when a blonde police officer pulled her over for speeding.
Officer: May i see your license?
Lady: what does it look like?
Officer: its a rectangular thing with a photo of you on it.
The lady looks through her bag and pulls out her compact mirror and hands it to the officer.

The officer opens it up and says 'if you had told me you were a police officer I wouldn't have pulled you over.'

[Spitfir3]

A Husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. 'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife. 'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans.' he replies. 'Put them back, we can't afford them.' demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping. A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket. 'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband. 'It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful.' says the wife. The husband replies: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price.

[RedTiger]

A Jamaican man is sitting watching tv and his wife comes up behind him and whacks him with a frying pan.

"Ay! Wa' dat for ?" He shouts.

"Me find one paper inna yu pocket wid a girl name on it, "Miss Maisy." she says.

"Wat you mean ? Me and me friend Leon went to de race track last week and Miss Maisy is de name a de horse dat run in de first race," he protests.

Two days later he is sitting watching tv again and "wack" one lick in him head back with a iron pot.

"Oooowww" he shouts, "wa' dat fa now?"

Wife replies, "Your horse deh pon di phone "!

[stev]

who do u call to get rid of water under your knee caps?




de-nyse plumber

[mitsu_chick941]

[COROLLA KID]

Boy: "Why do you straighten your hair?"
Girl: "Because it makes it longer."

Doctor: "Okay, tell me again how you burned your penis."

[tardissubie]

D zoo get a new lion dat cud run as swiftly as a cheetah... Dey name him



MUFASTA *facepalm*

[Trini Hookah]

D zoo get a new lion dat cud run as swiftly as a cheetah... Dey name him



MUFASTA *facepalm*

:|

[minipresident]

Big fight at a gypsy wedding in Ireland!

Goes to court and the judge says "Can anyone explain what happened?" Guy says... "I can,... I was the best man and I was dancing with the bride

...We were dancing quite close when the groom stormed up and kicked the bride on her azz".

"I see," says the judge. "That must have hurt!"

"Bloody right" says the guy,... " he broke 3 of my fingers".




*****

[FCDRIFTER]

Once upon a time mr. Crab was going to get married, so he told his best friend about his decision and invited him to be his best man, so his friend replied, "congrats man, I'd be honored, what day is the wedding?", to which mr Crab replied "next Saturday." But his best friend said " sorry bro, but I does be tie up in the market on a Saturday, I Cyah make."

[10k]

100 wigs gone missing













police say they combing the area.

[stev]

what happens when u pour red-bull on a stayfree pad?



...it gets wings

[DJShortCircuit]

who do u call to get rid of water under your knee caps?




de-nyse plumber

what happens when u pour red-bull on a stayfree pad?



...it gets wings

u really winning this competition wit dem jokes boy

[tardissubie]

In 1991 the idea for the first mass produced human lie detector was patented in China named :






Hu Yu Fu Lin

[kadijahveronica]

horse walks into a bar ,bartender ask y the long face

dah dum tssk

[pioneer]

You heard the italian chef died?

He pasta way

[Mr. Red Sleeper]

whatcha call a rasta with a wooden leg?



a mop

[Ronaldo9]

Cow runs in front of a truck on highway and gets knocked down,

BEEF!

[Mr. Red Sleeper]

thats CORNy