Women - Avoid abusive men! (a serious topic)

[rmlmv]

Readers, you may or may not agree with what I write below, but I still ask you to distribute it, for others to draw their own conclusions. I do believe young women reading this would at least get a heads up before getting into relationships.

This is a serious topic, so please respect its nature when posting responses.

About myself: I don't have a PHD (not a doctor), no great experience (young and not a player), and I'm not a perfect man. I'm a bit lazy and have a bad temper. - Rajiv L.

I decided to do this, because I realized that some women (both who I know personally and who I don’t) need help finding men who won't stalk, beat and/or kill them. Being alone and lonely is hard, I know this myself, especially if you have parents who want to force you to get married. But living in an abusive relationship is far worse.


Relationships:
-To repeat the point made earlier, don’t be forced into a relationship. There are many men out there. Unfortunately, the good ones are fewer available, but the bad ones are easy to spot. See the red flags below.

-Good relationships are about compromise and respecting each other. My favorite quote on the matter is: "The perfect marriage begins, when both partners believe they got more than they deserve." But simply, look for someone who also respects you and is willing to give up his preferences for yours, as often as you do for his.

-Respect yourself and your body. You shouldn't have to dress and act slutty to get a man.


What is a Red Flag!
A red flag is simply, a warning of danger.



Red-Flags for Abusive Relationships:


1. Violence or aggressiveness.
If he ever hits you, pushes you, throws something at you, etc., this is a big RED FLAG. Get out of that relationship.

2. Simple and uncalled for aggressiveness toward strangers.
This includes unwarranted rudeness to waiters. Whether your date is a CEO or street cleaner, if you feel, for instance, a small mistake by a waiter or someone else doesn't deserve the response made by your man, it doesn’t. Especially if he does it in front of you. Get out of that relationship.
Berating or insulting waiter or other person, as a first response to a mistake the waiter or person made, means the person either has a superiority or inferiority complex, and will eventually treat you the same.

I have noticed that a lot of men have this false sense of superiority. They like to think that the waiter or bartender is their slave, and give commands like "Gimmeh another beer there!" or "Come and do 'this'!". Then afterward they complain about their tab being too expensive. Two of the wealthiest men I met, Mr. A Lock Jack and D. Camacho, are possibly the most 'down to earth'. Still, these mediocre men who aren’t making much more than the waiter they want to put down.


3. Bad behavior when tipsy (high).
Firstly, being drunk at all, within the first few dates is a red flag. The person doesn’t know when to stop, and may never will. Being so drunk you pass out is NOT something that's OK for them to do, unless by accident or a good reason. But a drink or two to be a bit tipsy are fine, some people need it to relax. Note their behavior when they are tipsy or drunk. This is the real person who will come out eventually. Using illegal drugs, and (depending on your own views) marijuana are 100% not OK habits from your spouse.
Even being around others that use or are involved with it. Get out of that relationship.


4. Bad (reckless) driving habits.
Simply, if you find someone drives 'too fast and reckless', or drives drunk, he/she doesn't care enough for his/her or anyone’s life. There are so many fatal examples of this on our roads, and more counting.


5. Suicidal thoughts.
If ever in a relationship, the other mentions suicide (killing themselves) if you leave them, this is a BIG RED FLAG! Get out of that relationship, but you may need help and care to do so. Most likely he won’t want to die alone, and won’t let you have another man after him.


6. Unsafe sex
If it's the first time(s) you both are going to have sex, and he doesn't use, or even offer to use, a condom, this is a RED FLAG. Always use protection with strangers, and get out of that relationship if they try not to. Men would intentionally get you pregnant to trap you in that relationship.


7.Cheating
If he is cheating on another woman, with you, this is a Red Flag. If he is cheating on you this is also a red flag. Doesn’t matter what he promises to do. He does not respect you.

-Rajiv L (rmlmv)

[foss]

good stuff,

u missed out one though.

if your man is a as$hole this is a big RED FLAG. Get out of that relationship.

I always see a lot of ladies who are with as$holes, and never understood why when they could do much better. Fedup see ladies treated like sheit by their man in public, being ignored, cussed, ridiculed etc...

[shogun]

^^LMAO!
But seriously though,lots of women prefer muffler bearings.Many women/girls have "good guys" interested in them,but are so attracted to the "bad boy" image that they let that immature attraction rule their choices and date the wrong guy...yuh want "bad boy" tek bad boy.

[tourniquet]

Abuse is not a trait that's limited to men eh. Also, I think when people think of abusive relationships they tend to focus on physical and sexual abuse, but it's also important to remember that abuse takes different forms and includes verbal, emotional, and even economical.

[Lucian-2nr]

and women VERY guilty of economical/financial abuse

[zcarz]

Abuse is not a trait that's limited to men eh. Also, I think when people think of abusive relationships they tend to focus on physical and sexual abuse, but it's also important to remember that abuse takes different forms and includes verbal, emotional, and even economical.

x2

[rmlmv]

Thanks for the responses. I understand the economical/financial abuse on the other side as well.
I just wanted to focus on the physical and emotional abuse.

I got frustrated yesterday witnessing an abusive relationship, and discussing with the girl's cousins after, what type of person the guy was. The suicide red flag was actually raised early in that relationship, and the girl thinks she has no choice but to stay.

The guys parents actually intervened when she tried to leave, saying he's not eating etc., and he's the type of guy to attack any new boyfriend she has. The messed up thing is the girls parent's have the attitude that she is old enough to get married now, and he has shown interest in her... so, so be it.

I really think it's an education issue, where women need to know these red flags, and it's on the parents to teach these things. I'm thinking of printing the notes and anonymously sending it to her, and another woman I know. That might be the best I can do.


As much as I may not like Ian Alleyne, the show he had highlighting abuse to women was a good thing, and an eye opener. I was surprised how many women called in saying they were in abusive relationships.

[Michael Knight...]

Good stuff here. This applies to both parties always.

[cinco]

1pat Rajiv sound like a homo who get licks from he woman
if your woman out of the kitchen then you need the lix

[mitsu_chick941]

But seriously, the only man that have the right to hit me is my father and he doesnt use it, i'll be damned if i let some punk think he can and get away with it.


Domestic violence is more prevelant than we know.

[bushwakka]

what if u in a relationship wit a girl, and she say she gonna kill sheself if u leff she? whats the spin on that?

[foss]

what if u in a relationship wit a girl, and she say she gonna kill sheself if u leff she? whats the spin on that?

give her St. Ann's number

[4G63Turbo]

Who is the best marriage councilor in tnt?

[teems1]

^^

any bartender

[bluesteel29]

ressin lvl palm to buttocks is considered abuse??

[rollingstock]

But seriously, the only man that have the right to hit me is my father and he doesnt use it, i'll be damned if i let some punk think he can and get away with it.


Domestic violence is more prevelant than we know.

why yuh doh hush

all dem burners yuh collect from honda hoe and yuh tryna play big here

posing FTL

when yuh bend over you doh feel it much,you should know

ressin lvl palm to buttocks is considered abuse??

Apparently

[forsaken1]

what if u in a relationship wit a girl, and she say she gonna kill sheself if u leff she? whats the spin on that?

i say i alone gone thru that crap,they does trap u with that real bad,but on the topic of abuse i for myself hav seen that ladies who men beat love it and don't leave i don't know if they feel they can't do better or wat?i won't hit a woman that jus ain't make no sense,i jus laugh and walk away

[eurogirl]

When u're in it you think its the best thing to ever happen to you , everything is soo much better till you see the monster . 1 mistake it takes and the monster reveals himself .. then you wonder is this the man you love ? or is this a devil in a cape ? . ...

Then they blame themselves there fcuked up family life , there siblings they blame everyone but themselves for there mistakes they think by making them look like the social outcast bring you closer to him it works for a while ... always the rebel till you realise why everyone ostracise them .. you try to help them its like a fighting a lost cause .. its either you or him so you try to make it nice always taking the hits and taking the blame till you can't handle it anymore .......

the worst part is when you go public , people dunno how to choose sides .. they see this superstar, angelic friend to all,the really nice guy who always ready to help them out .. whilst u're the angry bitter beyotch who says nothing but gets the dirty looks because you soiled the superstar cape .. yet you can't see the scar the superstar left on her or the inner turmoil of the pyschological trauma he put her through ..

[evo-STI-k]

what if u in a relationship wit a girl, and she say she gonna kill sheself if u leff she? whats the spin on that?

been there, have the t-shirt, tell her to go ahead, just DONt touch me faking car

[Alpha_2nr]

^^FTW.

[crazybalhead]

When u're in it you think its the best thing to ever happen to you , everything is soo much better till you see the monster . 1 mistake it takes and the monster reveals himself .. then you wonder is this the man you love ? or is this a devil in a cape ? . ...

Then they blame themselves there fcuked up family life , there siblings they blame everyone but themselves for there mistakes they think by making them look like the social outcast bring you closer to him it works for a while ... always the rebel till you realise why everyone ostracise them .. you try to help them its like a fighting a lost cause .. its either you or him so you try to make it nice always taking the hits and taking the blame till you can't handle it anymore .......

the worst part is when you go public , people dunno how to choose sides .. they see this superstar, angelic friend to all,the really nice guy who always ready to help them out .. whilst u're the angry bitter beyotch who says nothing but gets the dirty looks because you soiled the superstar cape .. yet you can't see the scar the superstar left on her or the inner turmoil of the pyschological trauma he put her through ..

Your man wears a cape?

[Chipz]

When u're in it you think its the best thing to ever happen to you , everything is soo much better till you see the monster . 1 mistake it takes and the monster reveals himself .. then you wonder is this the man you love ? or is this a devil in a cape ? . ...

Then they blame themselves there fcuked up family life , there siblings they blame everyone but themselves for there mistakes they think by making them look like the social outcast bring you closer to him it works for a while ... always the rebel till you realise why everyone ostracise them .. you try to help them its like a fighting a lost cause .. its either you or him so you try to make it nice always taking the hits and taking the blame till you can't handle it anymore .......

the worst part is when you go public , people dunno how to choose sides .. they see this superstar, angelic friend to all,the really nice guy who always ready to help them out .. whilst u're the angry bitter beyotch who says nothing but gets the dirty looks because you soiled the superstar cape .. yet you can't see the scar the superstar left on her or the inner turmoil of the pyschological trauma he put her through ..

Your man wears a cape?

So she man is a superhero, I wonder what's he superhero name

[crazybalhead]

CaptaneCaCaWhole?

[wagonrunner]

CaptaneCaCaWhole?

he change name again?

[AllTrac]

I got frustrated yesterday witnessing an abusive relationship, and discussing with the girl's cousins after, what type of person the guy was. The suicide red flag was actually raised early in that relationship, and the girl thinks she has no choice but to stay.

wait what??
you discussed it with the girl?? the guy is the victim here!
im sure when he was showing her the business side of his palm he either had one of 4 things going on with him or all four.
he had on an wrinkled up shirt
he was hungry
he was under sexed
or
There was dishes in the sink.
If anything the guy should be given some sort of medal as he showed great restrain and she is able to move her jaw to talk about it.

[Conrad]

CaptaneCaCaWhole?

he change name again?

[mitsu_chick941]

I got frustrated yesterday witnessing an abusive relationship, and discussing with the girl's cousins after, what type of person the guy was. The suicide red flag was actually raised early in that relationship, and the girl thinks she has no choice but to stay.

wait what??
you discussed it with the girl?? the guy is the victim here!
im sure when he was showing her the business side of his palm he either had one of 4 things going on with him or all four.
he had on an wrinkled up shirt
he was hungry
he was under sexed
or
There was dishes in the sink.
If anything the guy should be given some sort of medal as he showed great restrain and she is able to move her jaw to talk about it.

ohhhhh you hide it so well





remember to buy the bread later eh

[rollingstock]

Oooooohhhhhh! Trac gonna get it later

[zoom rader]

I was glad to have a little respite from an Afro tuner trying to stoke Indo racists but now zoomrader is back.

hoss, what is ur leader's motive for not allowing pepper spray? its the least they can do to allow people to defend them selves at the point of attack.

I find for a big man with an opinion on plenty things you are largely uninformed on most of them. Who said that OUR leader not allowing pepper spray and why did our former leaders not allowed it?
https://103fm.tt/news/pm-reiterates-pep ... ay-stance/

I do not agree with pepper spray .

Women are more violent than men as they revert to hitting men thinking that they are female and get away with it .

Pepper spray in women's hands and she do as she pleases while citing you attacked her with no witnesses.

Men are more abused from women than men abusing women. When a woman abuses or hits a man it's not brought up as men just suppose sit back and take it cause they a "man" .

A woman will hit first and when you defend yourself it looks like you attacked her. Then she cries and looks for supports while you are looked apon as the abuser.

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/h ... 22388.html

[MaxPower]

Zoom,

A woman will only strike a man if they sense weakness.

A man is not supposed to be weak.

A man is supposed to protect and provide for his girls.

Many men put themselves in a position for women to strike them.

Control your women OR leave them alone.